As I mentioned in the ‘Pickle’ post (hehhehe that was such a funny title, BTW) I signed up at this ‘adult personals’ site last week. I was just bored as hell and figured I’d drop the 20$ and just see if there were any closet normal chicks in there, because the age group was finally in the right zone. I posted a totally normal variation of my normal BS and totally normal pics, and what follows is my sordid report from behind the scenes…

… First, they rejected the text. I write back and ask them WTF? They let it slide. Then they rejected my pics of me in my fully clothed uniform as “inappropriate” ROFL… here there are people posting pics of themselves getting screwed in the butt, and they think I’m “inappropriate” ehhehehe. So after I get settled there I start scamming on all the girls in my little area and I see this one:

…so I winked. I get a reply 20 mins later…. it’s the same girl I went out with the week before that I met on Yahoo! Except this time she’s looking for women and ‘couples’ as well! hehehe. Then I get an email from a 40yr old asking me if I’d like to screw her while her husband watched, but she wasn’t too hot so I politely declined:)

Next, a buff guy wearing nothing but hiking boots and tighty whiteys writes me up… ‘BiGuy43sum’ or something like that…. saying I showed up on his ‘new members’ list…. (mine only shows chicks, mind you) anyway he’s actually a nice guy and basically tells me I’m never ever going to get anywhere with my profile the way it is (although apparently it was good enough to get him hitting on me.) But he really was giving me sound advice, so I thanked him and explained I’m probably just going to let this expire at the end of the month and maybe the others too…. with all the time I spend online I figure I might do better if I just went out 2hrs a night and see what happens.

Anyway, after that, I get winked at by a local 22 yr old with the following profile:

Profile title: “Hi I’m single and always horny. I love to bang. I have a shaved twat and DD tits.”

(Entire) profile text: “I’m always horny talk to me and I’ll tell ya about myself. My ‘ideal person’ is a nice guy not scared of a woman that knows what she wants and loves having sex”

… so I write back and say something along the line that I’m not too comfortable with the whole random sex thing, to which she responds, “I’m looking for a serious relationship” obviously put off with me…. ehhehehehe now how in the hell would I know that? Even a master at reading between the lines would get that one wrong.

… and this is only day 3:)

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 27th, 2005 at 8:21 pm and is filed under Musings, Voyeurism. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.